So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! ~~ Romans 7:21-25 NIV
I confess--I want to do what is right and what is good all the time. Okay, okay, most of the time. Well, some of most of the time.
But I do not always make the right choices. Why do I do that?
I am thankful for God's word that shows me that I'm not the only one who struggled with this issue. The Apostle Paul described in Romans 7 his struggle with sin. He stated in Romans 7:15-20:
I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.c]"> For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. (NIV)
That's what I've been doing this July. Struggling. Why?
Because I have been doing what I hate to do and not doing what I want to do. That's the flesh warring with the spirit. How has this happened to me?
Others may not struggle with this, but this is my open and honest confession. I have struggled with mild depression and anxiety off and on for years. I realized in the last few years that these emotional struggles are related to dietary choices. (I realize not all people struggle in this area, such as my husband who cannot even begin to understand.)
I have a food nemesis. It's called SUGAR.
Sugar works in me like alcohol or drugs. It affects my blood sugar levels and turns me into a different person. I've read various books and reports on it. The consumption sugar increases my insulin levels, which in turn affect my hormone levels and causes all sorts of emotional distress.
I spent the last two days out of commission with a migraine (caused by out of balance hormones because of increased sugar consumption). While down and out, I spent some glorious time with the Lord. I realized it was my poor choices that put me down and out and that my choices have consequences.
I'm back up today and I realize it is part of my personal spiritual warfare to walk in obedience in my dietary choices.
Why do I have to do that? I have sin nature that is at work in my body. But thanks be to God who through Jesus Christ overcame for me. I confess and He is faithful to forgive. (1 John 1:9) With Jesus, I can live a life by the Spirit, not gratifying the desires of the sinful nature. (Galatians 5:16)
We all can. Thanks be to our Lord and Savior! I start again today, even though I did that.